The 647th Precinct, Headquarters of The C.O.P.S.

C.O.P.S. All Points Bulletin on All Music Stores

The 647th Precinct, Headquarters of The C.O.P.S.
The 647th Precinct, Headquarters of The C.O.P.S.

Back at the 647th precinct which serves as the main headquarters of the C.O.P.S. team, LongArm and Hardtop are observing a large map of Empire City.

Hardtop: “It was right here where we were stopped by that large oversize truck. If it weren’t for that long slowpoke-of-a-vehicle, we would’ve have them all by now.”

LongArm: “That violin is highly valuable. Big Boss must have wanted the violin in order to either learn how to play it or sell it for a fortune.”

Bulletproof: “Especially since the violin is valued at $15,000,000. I suspect Big Boss must be planning on selling it for the exact amount the violin is worth. Mainframe, see if there’s any auction events happening within the coming weeks.”

Mainframe types on the PC and finds that there’s no auctions happening on the Empire Community Calendar.

Mainframe: “Nope. Negative. No auctions happening any time soon.”

LongArm: “That figures. If there’s no auction happening at this time, then that leads to only one thing: Big Boss stole the violin so he can play it. But, could he be wanting to go out and steal some music sheets and accessories so he can learn how the play it, too?”

Bulletproof: “If he is, then an All Points Bulletin must be issued on all music stores in Empire City at once. LongArm, you and Hardtop will patrol the areas surrounding Melody Tunes Music Store that’s just been robbed twice. He may go there to rob it for the third time.”

Hardtop: “Right, Chief.”

LongArm: “He won’t be gettin’ away from me this time.”

Bulletproof: “Mace, Bowser and Blitz, the three of you will patrol the area surrounding Fiddlin’ Fancy Violin Place to see if Big Boss decides to get some violin music there.”

Mace: “One big sour note for the big guy coming up!”

Bowser: “We’ll have him hauled off to the pound on a big leash fit for the crimeboss! Right, Blitz?”

Blitz: “Arf! Arf!”

Bulletproof: “Mainframe and I will patrol the area surrounding a brand new music store located across the road from the new bank which is being scheduled to open tomorrow.”

Mainframe: “What’s the name of the store, sir?”

Bulletproof: “Empire Harps. An unlikely place for the crooks to strike at, but knowing them, they could strike at that place anyway in a matter of moments. Which means, there’s no time to loose. Let’s go.”

647th Precinct from a bird's eye view.
647th Precinct from a bird’s eye view.

Down the tubes and into the vehicles the C.O.P.S. went. Each split up to take their position in the areas each is assigned to patrol. Minutes later, Mace, Bowser and Blitz arrived at Fiddlin’ Fancy to patrol the area. But just as they got out of the car to look around..

Citizen: “HELP! I’VE BEEN ROBBED!!”

Bowser: “Sounds like trouble.”

Mace: “Come on!”

At once the 3 C.O.P.S. head inside Fiddlin’ Fancy to find the store’s proprietor very upset.

Bowser: *showing off his badge* “C.O.P.S. at your service. What’s seems to be the problem?”

Proprietor: “My store’s been robbed! Look at what’s missing from the shelf!”

Mace: “Uh oh! Looks like the crooks got here first. All the music books and sheets are gone.”

Bowser: “How did it happened?”

Proprietor: “I was using the bathroom when all of the sudden I heard screams, gun fire, and crashing sounds coming from outside the store. I was so scared, I thought whoever broke in is after my thousand dollar watch I have in my hand, but thankfully that’s not what the crook wanted. There were loud rummaging noises for a matter of seconds before I heard laughter and running footsteps leaving the store with all the music in hand. I waited until it was safe to come out. And when I did come out, all the music books and sheets are gone!”

Mace: “Don’t worry, sir. We’ll give whoever did it a sour note with these babies *showing off his handcuffs* and have those music sheets and books back here before you can strike a chord on one of your fiddles here. *reaches for a string on a violin*

Pluck! Snap!

Mace: “Oops!”

Bowser: “Uh Mace, I think you should stick with pulling triggers on your “Mazooka” instead of pulling a pizzicato on a violin there, buddy.”

Mace: *embarrassed* “Heh heh.. Sorry.”

Meanwhile across town, LongArm and Hardtop arrives at the Melody Tunes Music Store to continue the robbery investigation.

LongArm: “Man, would you look at what the crooks did to the door.”

Hardtop: “Yeah. Unless they used a crowbar, I doubt anyone could tear open a door the way Ms. Demeanor can– hinges in all.”

Longarm: “So she was here along with the rest of her pals. They must have came back to get the bow they carelessly left behind.”

Just then, an unusual motor sound signals the incoming of 2 jailbird air speeders, with Ms. Demeanor and Rock Krusher piloting them each.

Hardtop: “Uh oh. Trouble’s coming to make a pit stop here.”

LongArm: “Quick! Let’s get in here and hide.”

LongArm and Hardtop raced into the store and dives into an upright piano to hide from the crooks.

Then, peeping through the lid, the 2 C.O.P.S. watch as Ms. Demeanor and Krusher arrives and enters the store to go look for Berserko.

Krusher: *looking about* “Duh, I don’t see him anywhere here, Ms. Demeanor.”

Ms Demeanor: “Keep looking. He and that violin has got to be around here somewhere. We just can’t close the curtain down on Big Boss’ chances of being a star violin performer permanently all because of his nephew’s musical blunder.”

Krusher: “Easy for you to say.”

Just then Ms. Demeanor notices a selection of violin strings on a display shelf.

Ms Demeanor: “Oh look. Here’s some new violin strings. *grabs a handful a violin strings* These strings’ll replace the ones Berserko broke once we find him and get that violin back.”

Krusher looks around to notice an old piano nearby

Krusher: “Hey. Check out that neat ol’ piano right over there, Ms. Demeanor.”

Ms Demeanor: “Wow! An old classy piano straight from the olden days when I was a young crook attending and skipping high school! You know, this reminds me of the time when I was a teenager. I used to engage in mud wrestling at that one honky tonk place near the school where I used played hooky from. Inside the place, there was an old piano just like this one sitting in a corner near the mud pit. Every Friday night during the football season, one of the supporters from the school’s varsity league would go to the piano and play the school’s fight song every time our home team scored a touchdown. I can hardly remember how the song goes except one part I remember well that always ends with a great big RAH RAH RAH!!!

With that she slams her hands on the piano keys hard.

C.O.P.S.: “YEOW!!”

Out pops LongArm and Hardtop.

Ms Demeanor: “Well look who’d just popped out of the piano like a jack in the box.”

LongArm: “And look who’s popping into the nearest prison cell. You’re both under arrest for stealing the Stradivarius violin!

Ms Demeanor: “Oh dear, it looks like we got no choice but to put our hands up in the air, eh Krusher?”

Krusher: “Anything you say, Ms. Demeanor.”

But as the 2 crooks were putting their hands up, the 2 crooks suddenly lunged forward and seize both C.O.P.S.

LongArm: “Hey! Put us down!”

Hardtop: “Put us down, you creeps!”

Ms. Demeanor: “Relax! We’ll put you two down in a jiffy. Once we grab these…

She grabs some base violin strings.

Ms. Demeanor: ..tie you up like so..

She and Krusher ties the 2 C.O.P.S. up with them.

Ms. Demeanor: …put you back inside the piano…

She and Krusher throws the 2 C.O.P.S. back into the piano.

C.O.P.S.: “Whoa!!”

Ms Demeanor: “bring the piano outside…

She then rolls the piano out of the store and up a large hill.

Ms. Demeanor: …and send you flatfoots on a direct collision course to disaster in C Minor! Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha!!!!!”

And with that Ms. Demeanor and Krusher shoves the piano down the hill.

C.O.P.S.: “HEEEEEEEEEEEELLLLLLLLLLLLLLPP!!!!!”

And way down the hill goes the piano with the C.O.P.S. inside it.

C.O.P.S.: “WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAH!!!! YEEEOOOOOOOOWWWWW!!!!”

Suddenly they find themselves headed for oncoming traffic.

LongArm: “LOOK OUT! TRAFFIC!”

C.O.P.S.: “AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!”

But the 2 immediately whizzed on by just as the vehicles were about to pass through the green light.

C.O.P.S. *looking back* “Whew”

Hardtop: “That was close! But there no telling how long we’ll ever hold out before we really do collide!”

LongArm: *struggling* “Just.. gotta.. break.. free.. of.. these.. bonds…. urrrrr!”

Hardtop looks at a brick wall in the middle of a dead end street in front of them.

Hardtop: “LongArm! We’re heading for a brick wall!”

LongArm: *struggling* “URRRURRRRRRRRR… Must break FREE!”

Snap! LongArm breaks free from his bonds.

LongArm: “There, I’m free! Hold still, buddy, while I untie you!”

Hardtop: “Hurry, LongArm! There’s only seconds ’till impact!”

LongArm quickly frees Hardtop and made ready his power cuffs.

LongArm: “Hold onto me tight, Hardtop! This light post up ahead is our one way ticket out of this jam!”

Instantly, Hardtop clings to his partner as LongArm aims his power cuffs and fires. It attaches itself to the post and pulls LongArm and Hardtop out of the piano and out of harm’s way. A few seconds later, the piano crashes into a brick wall and shatters into many splinters as LongArm and Hardtop breathes out a huge sigh a relief as they hang on for dear life.

Hardtop: “Close call!”

LongArm: “You can say that again. A few seconds and we would’ve find ourselves in the great big precinct up in the sky.”

If they did, They would’ve seen angels flying around, strumming on a certain musical instrument that will captivate the heart and soul of a special C.O.P.S. officer very soon.

*to be continued*

Owosso Harpist

Sherry Konkus lives in Owosso, MI. She's the proud author of The Punisher Harp Zone and the one who came up with The All-New, All-Different concept of The Punisher from Marvel Comics being portrayed as the punishing harpist who plays the harp in memory of his family who were killed by the mob years ago.

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Owosso Harpist

Sherry Konkus lives in Owosso, MI. She's the proud author of The Punisher Harp Zone and the one who came up with The All-New, All-Different concept of The Punisher from Marvel Comics being portrayed as the punishing harpist who plays the harp in memory of his family who were killed by the mob years ago.

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